There is no universal definition of “bad” & “good” and yada yada, bleh bleh, pew pew. Moving on…
For as long as I remember, every other person I initially speak to points the same “character flaw” of mine, either when I ask or they mention it unprompted
It goes along the lines of: “You’re too cocky”, “You’re too egoistic”, “You think you’re better than everyone”
Internally, the three ways I look at this are:
- Yes, I’m cocky cause I deserve it. I’ve worked hard for my accomplishments. I don’t come from that much privilege. I’m trying to gnaw my way out of the gutter
- No, it’s just a fascade, internally, I’m really insecure about myself, and I’m a tryhard doing my best to impress you. I’m just faking confidence while I’m on the verge of breaking down, where every day I torment myself into believing I’m no better than scum
- No, they’re just insecure, or maybe something along those lines. Go by my merit, not by meaningless first-impression observations
I don’t know which lane of thought I truly believe in -- it keeps oscillating between all three
All of that, while I truly wonder, is it that bad to be “cocky” / unconsciously appear as “cocky” -- why the fuck do I need to force myself to be “humble”
But ehh, opportunities go because of this “character trait”